Halloween: Resurrection - Film Review

Halloweenthon Day 8

Halloween: Resurrection is directed by Rick Rosenthal and stars Busta Rhymes, Bianca Kajilich, Tyra Banks, Katee Sackhoff, Sean Thomas Patrick, Donna McCracken, Ryan Merriman, and Jamie Lee Curtis.

Plot
Three years after he last terrorized his sister, Michael Myers confronts her again, before traveling to Haddonfield to deal with the cast and crew of an Internet reality show which is being broadcast from his old home.

Review
Oh god I don't want to.

I'll just say, this is the low point of the series. I hate this movie. It's an insult to the series, and an insult to Laurie Strode. It turns out that she killed the wrong person in H20. She actually killed a paramedic, after she beat Michael at the school, a paramedic goes to check on him, but Michael crushes his larynx, making him unable to speak, takes the paramedic's clothes, and then leaves. They had to milk this series even more after H20 was a good enough ending. So since then she's been at a mental hospital, and of course Michael finds her and she traps him on the roof and tries to take off the mask to see if it's really him. Michael takes advantage of this, pulls her down and stabs her. What a truly horrible ending.

The rest of the movie are teens being told they're going on an Internet reality show in the Myers house and then being in it and there's nothing interesting.

There is literally a scene where Busta Rhymes is dressed as Michael and the real Michael walks behind him and Busta Rhymes starts yelling at him and then Michael just walks away, I guess he was too confused to kill him.

There's a scene earlier in the movie where this is guy is setting up cameras in the Myers house and he's talking to Tyra Banks and he's like "low angles: scary. High angles: scary. Normal angles: boring." and while Tyra Banks isn't looking, Michael kills the guy with the end of a tripod (that had very sharp edges for some reason) and drops it on the floor. Tyra Banks tells him that's a nice angle (the camera on the ground with the tripod showing, yeah that's a nice angle).

There is a scene where Busta Rhymes defeats Michael with kung fu and gives one of the worst lines in the series: "Trick or treat, mothafucka!" I don't like this movie. Later, they look at Michael in a body bag after he's been burned and Busta Rhymes says he looks "like chicken fried muthafucka!" And then a coroner goes to perform an autopsy on Michael and he attacks her, ending this movie and the series until Rob Zombie felt the need to reboot it.

I can't really talk much about the cast, as there's nothing to them, so there are two I want to talk about.

Jamie Lee Curtis is back as Laurie, and they used a picture of her from H20 on the poster even though she doesn't look like that in the movie. I talked about her already, but Laurie being in the movie is the only positive I can think of.

Busta Rhymes is not good in this at all. I guess after LL Cool J was in H20, and that was a good movie, they decided to put another rapper in the movie and it turned out garbage. He and Tyra Banks run this Internet show in the Myers house, and they put props and stuff around the house to scare them into thinking that they may find out Michael's motives, and Busta Rhymes admits this and tells them that they probably wouldn't have found out anything anyway.

Overall, Halloween: Resurrection is awful and a disgrace to the series. I'm glad to get past this, but what I'm not glad about is that over the next two days I'm going to talk about the Rob Zombie films, and I really don't want to.

Halloween: Resurrection gets a 1/10.

Previous review - Halloween H20: 20 Years Later
Next review - Halloween (2007)